9 days ago!

Wow its been 9 days that i have been on this new "life style", and i have not once "cheated" for real this has NEVER happened before, before i would be craving all sorts of bad unhealthy stuff, today it does not even cross my mind as something i would want, all because i am committed and ready for a new me.
9 days ago there was 7.2lbs more of me (last checked on Saturday) and i felt tired seemed like all the time, today am full of energy and can go go go. next weigh in is Feb 9Th. :), i made Eric hide the scale so i would not be tempted to sneak a peek, i want to wait til my first 17 days are up.
9 days ago was the last day i felt a heart palpation, and this in its self is worth every effort.
when i was 13 yrs old i was told by the doctor i had a mitral valve prolapse, not a big deal to most people and most people walk around not even knowing they have it, i have a much bigger problem with mine due to the valve being a little bit more "leaky" than normal. i am watched carefully by a cardiologist and checked yearly for changes. i have to be careful with things like having babies (which i done so not worried about it), infections etc.
Even bigger i was telling mom all about what has changed doing this life style change and she said "Corinna  am proud of you", wow my mom is happy for me, even when she is sick with lung cancer, it makes me so happy to know she still is mom even when she is sick, she will always be a mom and lives up to it well, i learned from the best.
 i am proud of her for fighting so hard to stay alive, that can't be an easy job to master when you are in pain. she is my hero!
Anyway that's all for today, hope everyone has a great day i know i will.

Day 2 down 2.2 Lbs. :)

That's right, i was not going to even touch the bathroom scale until next Sunday, but I was curious about if i was having the same results as other people, and I AM, i am happy that this new life style works with out feeling like your on a diet.
Don't get me wrong there are things that I am not allowed like all carbs, no sugars, no starches, no beef, no pork, fat contented dairy, etc. but i am allowed most veggies some fruits and lean chicken, turkey,fish ad eggs. this is not forever its only for 16 more days then i get to have a few new thins introduced into this.
I am having some headaches due to the " withdrawal" from carbs and sugar, but nothing an Advil won't take care of, this should be fixed by day 5, or so they say it will. LOL
I feel different today, i woke up before my alarm this morning and felt good well rested and not slumpy. I don't drink coffee right now because i like my coffee with the flavored creamer, and rather not have it at all right now and focus on "detoxing" my body. I'll add coffee in when i feel i am not going to be falling of track with temptation to sugar.
I am not expecting the same result everyday but I am happy with how after just 1 day there is a difference in my weight and my over all health.
Anyway have a good day everyone. hope everyone's day is filled with sunshine. :)

Sunday is the start day!

So like i said in the last post, i will be starting the 17 day diet, i finally got my book yesterday, i have read though to the cycle 1 part and a bit of the doctor advice on this diet, this is it, i am ready to change me to hopefully have a better impact on my life.
We can't change the world around us, and trust me if i could change things right now, i would change above all things to change, cancer to not exist it has hurt some of the closest people to my heart, but lets be honest here and realize we can't change most things but we have the power to change ourselves to hopefully show our kids that change is sometimes good, I'm sick of looking at myself and seeing myself hide behind a layer of fat.
And me loosing weight is something mom has asked me to do, she knows the weight i carry is dangerous to my heart problems, so i am not saying i am doing this for her, because i NEED to do this for me, because if i were to do it for any other person i won't stick to it, in the past i tried to loose weight for my husband, my kids, my family in general, but this time i have realized this needs to be a 1 on 1 battle between myself and I.
So here i go i am gonna start in the morning tomorrow, today we are going grocery shopping and i printed out the grocery shopping list of foods that are allowed on the cycle 1.
By the way there is 4 cycles that last 17days each to do, the 1st one is a "detox" cycle, no sugar, no bad fats, and lord help me no carbs, that will be the tough one because i am a carb addict. LOL but i am determined to do this, it wont be easy but it will be a challenge to do, the first 5 days are the hardest ones and after that the book says it should get easier.
Well that's all for now i will keep the blog updated on my progress, i won't be putting on her how much i weigh. but i will post how much i am down. my goal is to loose 70ish lbs.
Have a great day everyone. :)

Hi, it's just me again.

Another day, Aidan and Edina are gone to school, Eric is gone to work and Rhiannon and I are left here at the house, some people would be thankful for the time of peace but not me, I MISS MY KIDS when they are at school, i look forward to the weekends probably more than them, they are who i am, i was put on this earth to be their mother and am lucky enough to be able to stay at home and be here for them, i enjoy the time spent with them.
the days that they are gone are filled with house cleaning, laundry, cooking, and Rhiannon and I spend alot of time coloring, playing Lego, dollies, dress up, and sometimes we watch a movie together. yesterday i got a bit scared when i thought of when then the kids go back to school in the fall after the summer break Rhiannon will be going with the other 2 to attend the pre-k program, i am kinda sad about this, this means my babies are growing up and this is the start of them learning to fly. don't get me wrong i am happy to see them explore their world and i know it only school but its the start of them becoming them for life. I have thought about home schooling them but i also want them to have the social interaction that i know if i home schooled them they would not have that. i am sure that when the time comes i will find away to deal with it and keep myself busy.

So the new year brought some big decisions for me, i guess most people think they know themselves, and i thought i did, but it turned out i did not, i need to find myself, and that means things have got to change, from things like my weight which is the biggest thing.
 i have yo yo dieted most of my life, this goal i know this most peoples new year resolution and is one that  need to focus on, and in order to focus on it i needed to "detox" my life, i have been reading another blog to help me realize why i have not been able to loose the wieght.tksinclair.com its written by a lady who has some times a funny way of identifying why we are fat, her insight to weight loss is one i find i can understand, because it is why i am fat overweight.
I am not aiming to be a perfect bodied person because lets be honest i have 3 kids and they are my focus in life, my goal is to drop 70 lbs and just be a healthy role model for my kids, i want to be here for them like my mom has and always be there for me and my sisters.
so far i have managed to get rid of 8 lbs in 2 weeks :) so i got 62 lbs to go to my goal, the blog link above the lady on there follows the 17 day diet, i am not on that yet but i do plan on getting on it, just as soon as my book gets here, so i am starting on a diet myself cutting out salt, sugar, and trying to cut back on carbs, i read into the 17 dd a bit and i think if by time my book gets here i should be ready to jump on the 17 dd train, I'm thinking of it as a weaning off of carbs plan right now, and seems to be working.
well thats all for now, the laundry is not going to do itself, hope you have a great day, because i know i will. :)

Lets Celebrate! :)

So lets change all this crappy news that has been going on, I had said on my FB yesterday that change was a good thing, a oh boy do I have some REALLY GOOD news, I have been wanting to post something good on here and now is the time to let the world know...........
Yesterday my mom had a x-ray, blood work and a talk with her doctor. she was so nervous waiting on the doc to come in and he was running a bit late, but he had some good news to share.
THE SMALL TUMORS WHICH WERE IN THE RIGHT LUNG AND AIRWAY ARE GONE, THE LARGE TUMOR IN THE LEFT LUNG WHICH USE TO FILL THE WHOLE LEFT LUNG HAS GOTTEN SMALLER FREEING UP THE LOWER PART OF THE LUNG.
I am so proud of mom she is fighting this cancer even when the treatments knock her down, this IS the power of the will to live, she is determined to see her grand kids grow, she is not going to let cancer have the upper hand.
I think this has given her the motivation and the HOPE to keep going, to know that the cancer is leaving when all the docs said it won't, no one can tell you when you will die, that is something that will happen when you are ready, and i think deep down dad is not ready to go either even when he says he wants to.
BTW dad did eat too yesterday, and did make the choice some what on his own to do so.
Moms blood work yesterday came back with a low hemoglobin so this morning before she gets her chemo this afternoon she will be getting 2 units of blood.
we were planning on going to Edmonton to see dad and mom should be there too, but due to heavy snow fall warnings we will make the trip next weekend.
I want to thank everyone who is praying for them both to heal, words can not say how humbling that is to know you care.................THANK-YOU!
I know I will have a great day, and i hope everyone has a great day too. :)

Dear Dad:

I would normally ask how you are, but I know you are not OK, you are in the hospital still its been a week and half that you have been, you went in there because you tried to starve your body of the means to heal, you also admitted to being depressed and so we asked you to go in to heal your body and your mind, your body with the help of the doctors and nurses has healed for the most part but your mind has not, you have and you want to give up, you have lost the will to live, it hurts us all to know you don't wish to not be here with us, we need you dad and most of all we love you.
You were given the cancer diagnosis of  the neck on September 14Th 2010, the day after you turned 63, and in 3 1/2 months you now look as if you were 83, mom was given hers just 24 hrs later, stage 4 lung cancer with little hope to survive, i know it must have been so much to deal with because we were all there too, you completed your treatments before Christmas and there is good hope for you to have the cancer gone, so many people go though this and some won't make it, in fact you know someone close to you that will not make it, she is known as you wife and my mother, her heart is broken just knowing you don't want to live, when she is fighting so hard to stay.
The picture above is the picture that says so many words to me, the tears in your eyes say you are proud to give me away as a wife to my husband, maybe even sad because you feel like your losing me, my hand on your arm as you guide me to my new future and your hand holding mine as you tell me you love me. Dad where did you go, i miss you, your body is here but with out your sound mind it feels as if we are grieving the loss of you. I still need my dad and my mom, we all do.
Please don't give up daddy we love you and we need your loving arms again to tell us you will hold us when we want to fall apart.
    with love from: wrinkles.