I survived my first Mothers day without mom.

I dreaded Mothers day for a while, knowing that i don't get to wish mom a happy mother's day.
So here is how i survived it.
On Saturday we did some  a lot of yard work, and as the day turned into night and the kids went to bed, and 9:30pm Eric went off to bed, i stayed up, and cleaned the house, i cried as i washed the floors, and about 12:30am i went to bed too
I layed there a while talking myself into not being upset in the morning, the kids were looking forward to giving me their home/school  made cards and gifts, even Rhiannon who had help from the other two.
I awoke in the morning to swollen eyes, the kids were still sleeping, and i took the quite time to have a coffee and watch some Reno show on T.V.
I cooked our normal Sunday brunch (pancakes, eggs, sausage or bacon,  fruit, and yogurt). After that is when the kids gave me their creations they made, i have always love those home made with love kinda gifts from my kids and have kept all of them so far,  after they are displayed for a week or two, i date and name them and tuck them away with all the others they have made me, as i tuck them away, i marvel at the other gifts from them from years past. I know some day when we are empty nesters i will be sobbing over them.
Soon after we finished up with the gift giving, i asked the kids if they wanted to see me give my Mothers day card to my mom? We went outside and i was carrying a pink balloon with a mothers day message i wrote on it, and as i said "Happy mothers day mom" i let the balloon go, we watched it until it disappeared into the clouds.
It was my way of lessening the heartache i had, It felt good.
I just wish she was here, and not in heaven.
After all that we again worked in the yard, and i became angry, i yelled and asked for time alone i the yard, i cried as i worked, and as some time went on i felt better.
By 8pm the kids went to bed, and Eric and I finished up the day with watching "little fockers" while i folded laundry. I needed something to laugh at, i have cried enough the pat 2 days, i feel like i have forgot how to laugh, but after that movie it was back.
This is a busy week, I got to get as much stuff done between today and Thursday, because on Friday we are off to a Mutual Propane (the company mom worked for, and dad still currently works for) banquet, they hold these yearly and this year is supposed to be a tribute to mom. can't wait i love hearing how she touched so many people.
And next week i am going to be in Edmonton as dad has surgery, it will be stressful, and i am confident he will pull though it. i will post how it all goes.
That's all for now, until next time. have a great day.